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Thigh-Burst | Watermelon Crush

Updated: Apr 25, 2021

Impotent Products

Are you ready for an edible that is going to make your head feel like it's being crushed by a woman with incredibly strong thighs? A woman who has a blood vendetta against you? A woman who has been going through rigorous daily training of using her thighs to crush watermelons until they burst, all in the hope of one day finding you and choking your lights out once and for all? Oh, you're not ready for something like that? Alright, more oxygen-denying brain damage for myself then.


Pick up a box of Thigh-Bursts in the section of the weed store where the bud tender is gripping a ball point pen like it was used by Jason Bourne to kill their family.

The original Hi-Burst packaging

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