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The Bravocado

Updated: Feb 12, 2020

Impotent Products

Woman wearing an avocado bra.
This bra holds in all the good fat.

Are you ever halfway through your growler of kombucha, munching on bulk raw cashews out of a reusable bag and think to yourself, "How can I use my catholic guilt upbringing to further shame myself into being even less of a burden on society?"?


Well Impotent Products has the research-proven undergarment for you! Presenting...


--The Bravocado--


Is it eco friendly?

Yes!


Can I eat it?

Can you? Yes!


Is it comfortable?

Pass!


Will it compost my nipples?

No! We think! Gary thinks. He did all the research--granted, he had a seventeen-dollar budget.


Supplies are limited, so you may end up waiting one day.

Two days.

Three days.

THE FOURTH DAY IT'S IN STOCK And the fifth day it's out again.


Sold wherever volunteer co-op cashiers don't bag your groceries.


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