top of page
On kindle and paperback
Search
Jan 19, 2019
Commy Crunch's Oops! All Gulags
Impotent Products I hope you like the flavor of potatoes/cabbage/starvation, as this cereal will lock up your taste buds until death...
41
Jan 17, 2019
Conceal Carry Barbie
Impotent Products Car bombs nor air strikes will stop this Barbie from getting her hair did. Sold wherever neighborhoods are sketch. #Barbie
101
Jan 4, 2019
SMUCKER'S Eucharistables
Impotent Products Do you love eating the body of Christ but hate that it tastes like bread because it is? With SMUCKER'S Eucharistables...
11
Jan 2, 2019
NON-Toxic? I Thought You Said VERY Toxic Markers for Children
Impotent Products Honest mistake, really. Sold (before they're recalled) wherever sleeves are dampened with snot. #CrayCrayola #Creybola
8
Oct 19, 2018
Chapel Stick Sin Protectant
Impotent Products Does your preacher ail from dry, cracked lips after a prolonged service rife with condemnation and repentance? Well...
46
Oct 17, 2018
PoliO's
Impotent Products Everyone's favorite virus is (destroying your) back! Come for the oats; stay for the spine-numbing sensation! Mmmm...
5
Oct 1, 2018
Fu-silli String
Impotent Products Are you tired of laboring over a hot stove all day, cooking pasta pulled from a bag the old fashioned way? Forget that...
13
Sep 7, 2018
Contraceptives by Konami
Impotent Products Forget the Konami code, tonight you're getting laid regardless. Available wherever Bill and Ted say, "Woah." #Contra...
5
Aug 9, 2018
Simon and Garfunkel's "The Smell of Silence"
Impotent Products Have you ever wanted to smell like Simon and Garfunkel's 1966 album Parsley, Sage, Rosemary, and Thyme? Well now you...
15
Aug 9, 2018
3 Kim Knockout
Impotent Products North Korea's legendary soju made with saliva from the Kim family is now available wherever human rights are not....
1
bottom of page